Just Newlyweds

We spent our weekend in Fargo. This wasn't some second honeymoon in good old ND. We went to attend a wedding of a good friend of ours. Post-college, I have come to love weddings. Weddings are a better version of a high school/college reunion because you're only running into your friends. I have never actually been to a reunion, nor do I plan on it, because most of the people I would run into are not high on my priority list. If I'm not close enough with that person to keep in touch, then I don't really mind if I know what they are doing with their lives now. So, for that reason, weddings are way better than reunions.


Weddings are also filled with fuzzy people. These are the people that you know and if you think about it hard enough, you can probably remember their names. Or, if you can't, you jab a parent, point, and are reminded of the fuzzy person. Usually along with pointless knowledge of them that you don't really care to know, such as which street they used to live on. Most had no clue that Tim and I were married. The usual question, "how long?" We would look at each other, smile, and answer that it had been two years. Warning, a rant is coming up. The couple would usually smirk at each other and reply "why, you're just newlyweds!"


What in the world does that mean? Just newlyweds? Oh, you're not REALLY married yet, you're  newlyweds. You can't possibly understand what marriage is, you've only been married for two years. Wait a few more years and then we will recognize your marriage as valid.


Really folks? Sure, we may not have twenty years under the belt like some, but I tend to think we have a legitimate marriage. We have gone through huge, stressful changes together. Although these were not fun, they have made us much closer. Sadly, my brain had no logic in the actual conversation. Instead, I would reply with "Yep, but we dated for three years beforehand." Thinking that surely this would silence them. They would only shake their heads and say that dating is completely different than marriage. Which is true, dating is completely different.


But, isn't there a different response they could have had? Something along the lines of encouragement or congratulations? Maybe I'm over reacting. Maybe this is a phrase that they once heard and they wanted to bestow on someone. A rite of passage perhaps. Maybe I need to forget what they say like I have forgotten their names. Who cares what fuzzy people think anyway?

It may have only been two years, but it feels so much longer. Moving to the cities, full-time jobs, getting a puppy, buying a house. We really have enjoyed everything all of our big changes and each other along the way. So take that possibly well meaning veterans!